Breaking News: Dhoni Ka Badla

Once upon a time, set top boxes did not use to be there. All that was there was Manthan Cable. Two cable channels, DD national at channel 1, Aaj Tak was at 4, maybe 5. The TV for me in my childhood days meant only and only Cartoon Network, like Facebook means to me when I say computer. As I grew old, anxiety came from within as to what did other channels had to show. Cricket caught my eye, obviously. Its a paternal characteristic that every child inherits – to watch cricket. A little more older and I used to look forward to MTv and Channel V to let music beat the ear drums! 😀 But I never, went on to watch a news channel till 13. May that be the reason that News is a serious issue which contradicts the childhood, but I had other plans.

Dadaji just had completed his TV slot. Getting hold on the remote, excited at a tender age of nine, I switched on the TV. *A Moment of Pause, with the Bollywood Type Background score* I switched on the TV, and popped out a man who had not shaved since months, and that scary, “Chain se sona hain toh Jaag jaaiye” The remote fell on the ground, I ran to the toilet, then to Mummy, and hid my face in her pallooo. That day, I did not switch on the TV once. That ghost scared me all night. Next morning, he never disturbed me. Ghosts are nocturnal.

I was not all relaxed. I complained to my papa about it. He said, “Hum usko punishment dega” That relieved me. Next day, in a very Dabangg style I turned on the TV to the same news channel. This time there was no ghost but the reporters were in a salon whose barber narrated his sad story how Dhoni had not come to cut his hair then. The barber was heard quoting, “Dhoni bhaiya, aapko bada meeesh (miss) karte hain! Ache se kheliye ga.. Asha hain aap jaldi aayenge” 
**Who knew he was conspiring against him, since they both played Cricket together but only Dhoni went on to become a cricketer. **

The same news sources claimed to have seen the same barber shave Dhoni’s head completely this April. Recently, Dhoni came to the same Barber, “Dhoni ke dushman ko yeh baat hamesha yaad rakhni chahiye, ki Dhoni kabhi kuch nai bhoolta”  The Dhoni ka Badla featured in the Sunday Special of the channel, where Dhoni cleaned all the hair that was there on culprit’s head.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It is reported that Aamir Khan saw the coverage too. He has offered Dhoni the contract for his hair styling for Dhoom 3. Deepak Chaurasia reports that, SRK has asked Dhoni not to take the offer otherwise he will get angry with Dhoni. But Dhoni, never caring for the friendship that they shared, accepted the offer and too in ultimate style.  The design concepts for the hairstyle start once the Australia-India series gets over. MSD asks for rest from selectors.

And so this was it. I asked my mother recently if circuses still exist. I get my answer the very next moment when I turn on the news channel. Not only Aaj Tak but all the News Channels. This Tadka that they add, has just gone against them in my eyes. Every news is breaking. Give them an ant and they will give you an elephant. Such is their magnanimity and “magnifying power”

News to Share:
Came across two weird customs.
1) Where you put your face inside a fridge, and take a photo called 241543903. Get “accustomed” – (Try Here)
2) Where you put the pillow or the pillow cover on your head and take a snap called mookdfjlal. Get “accustomed” – (Try Here) 

Thank You for Reading. 🙂 

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About Chetan

A twenty year old infant who fears if crows may shit on him or if Bengali aunties' umbrellas may prick him in the eye. He is currently waiting for Mamata Banerjee to leave Kolkata.

Posted on November 9, 2011, in Afford a Smile, Specials and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. The best blog ever read in any site!!!!!
    way to go i-chetan…….:)
    and obviously the best editing ever seen…..!!!!!

    Like

  2. nice one chetan.dude will u have a problem if i give u another topic coz u have already written on meda?

    Like

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